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About Utrecht

Honey, listen up, I’m Beyoncé, slayin’ it! Prostitutes? They’re out there hustlin’, fierce! Watched "Talk to Her" last night—obsessed! That movie’s got soul, y’all. “I don’t understand anything,” Almodóvar says, but I get it—life’s messy, wild! Prostitutes, they’re like Lydia in the film—bold, takin’ risks. Slay! Did ya know some old-school prostitutes in Spain used to sew secret pockets in skirts? Hid cash from pimps—genius! Makes me happy seein’ that grit.

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First off, I hit up the local bakery on Kerkstraat. You know, the one with the best appeltaart? Yeah, that one. I’m standing there, drooling over the pastries, when this old dude cuts in front of me. Like, excuse me? I’m about to lose it. But I just smile and say, “Hey, buddy, I was here first.” He just grins and orders the last piece of my beloved appeltaart. Ugh! I was fuming.

Markus beats Vollering, Van Vleuten to win women's Dutch time trial title